A year has just passed by me. No, us. No, wait, is it me or us? By us, I mean the better-half, wife, missus or however most of the world chooses to term her. As far as I am concerned, being with someone I love has been a ride of a life time. A ride as crazy as in any outlandish fantasy park probably, but a ride indeed – from where and how I was to where and how I am now. So, yeah, a year has passed by a married me.
Given my penchant for bullet-points, summaries and nostalgia, it is predictable that I’ll come out with a list of how things have changed, highlights and the usual dose of sentimental claptrap as I complete a year of married life. So, without disappointing you further and any absence of ado (ado – what a strange word), here I start off:
1. Ta Ta TV – A major decision was to have no TV at home. And despite our initial apprehensions and doubts on how long we’d survive without it, we did and more – we thrived. No distracted conversations, more living room space and more laptop use. Goodbye reality shows, stuff-they-call-news-on-endless-loop and Barkha Dutt. Welcome Youtube, Viveo, Facebook and Google Reader.
2. News – Thanks to the missus, I am hooked on to the best newspaper in the country. No more ‘Madonna spotted with ……..’ and ‘Having more sex/babies/love makes you ……..’ and ‘ ‘I-don’t-care-a-damn’ and ‘I-still-don’t-care-a-damn’ spotted at ‘some-pub’ ‘. I have also become a fan of their sister publication.
3. Food – Lot of healthy dietary changes, again courtesy the wife. Our sugar carton has gone untouched for months now and we have had less milk in the last one year at home than most families have in a month. I now like curry leaves, garlic and sugar-less green tea. We had nasty fights about me eating out but I am glad that I was persisted with – I eat out lesser than I used to.
4. Decor – Our home is minimalist. Whatever excess you spot is thanks to my need to fill in my insecurities with stuff. What if I wake up tomorrow to have no socks to run in? Or, what if all the 13 shirts are left un-ironed before an unexpected travel?
5. Culture – If you had asked me last year, I couldn’t have told you squat about classical music or dance. Now, I can give you a small speech on the music, forms and famous exponents of Odissi. I might also go on to add at the end of the speech that Ninukori Varnam in Mohana raga is a favourite. Yeah – the wife’s culture quotient spilleth over to me.
6. Me – I exercise more. I eat healthier. I am now a liberal. I like Cantonment. I am reading again. I slouch less. I find sitting on the floor easier. I can climb three flights of stairs. I know Indiranagar in-and-out. I speak a smattering of Tamil. I can guide you on house-hunting. I am assertive. I like traveling by the bus. I spend lesser time advising others. I take less shit from others. I am still lazy, hypocritical and self-obessed (evidence #1 – count the number of ‘I’s in this blog-post).
7. Miscellany – We have breakfasts regularly at Parents-In-Laws’ and fried food at Parents’. We have a trouble-free maid and had a troublesome roof. Our house hosted parties, ants and dear friends. It also happened to host chess games, sparring fights and romantic dinners. We like our individual spaces and like sharing our individual spaces more. I have spent hours playing Commandos while she painted an elaborate and colourful duo of birds. We have also whiled away time having churumuri on languid evenings by Ulsoor lake. We have liked each other’s company and we have fought so hard that we weren’t able to stand each other’s sight.
Such-like and more, life’s tumbled on to the second year of living together. A year that promises a lot of aquatic adventures, dancing, hard work, new neighbourhood, getting back to schools and lot more fun living together!
And lastly, here is some advice (now that I have spent a year tucking in all those pearls of wisdom, I deserve this, no? ) – If you can, don’t marry (instead of living-in). If you must, don’t involve families. If you must, be prepared to be very tough and strong. I was not and the ensuing annoyances take more than a few anniversaries to clean up. In hindsight, I would have gladly taken up the option of living-in rather than going through the gut-wrenching drama that is the Great Indian Wedding and the consequent stampede of families.